I feel ugly. It's all the stress, the junk food, the inactivity, and the fact that my hair is falling at an alarming rate. I got pimples from this new serum I tried out, so I have fresh blemishes on THE side of my face that I worked months to clear up completely. I haven't been religious with suncreen lately so my skin is uneven. 

I look at my old pictures and think, "Why can't I look like that again?" But then I saw a photo I took just yesterday.

I don't look bad. In fact, I look pretty nice! True, it's the lighting, makeup, angle, and a bit of post-processing to adjust the color - but the thing is I already had something good (i.e. myself) to work on. I know that some people treat makeup with disdain, as if it's exclusively something that women wear to cover up their insecurities. That may be true some of the time but for me, I love makeup because it makes me realize - everyday - that I am not ugly at all.

I spend serious time taking product photos that I even have it down to a science. So understandably I'm not happy whenever an online store filches my photos to earn money. I mean, how hard is it to take your own product photos or even just ask permission from the owners? 

Those are my Revlon Colorburst Lip Butter photos. Do not approve  ಠ_ಠ

Not meaning to be a bitch here, actually. I'm not mad, just baffled. All my photos are under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 (CC BY-SA 3.0) license. It means that:

I think that the Internet should be a free place to share our ideas and output, and to police it by banning people from using your photos is just pointless.

I just tune out on most weekends. As in, I try not to think or do anything that doesn't involve eating, reading, watching or shopping. And maybe checking this blog once in a while. Hehe. Anyway, I just want to share the stuff I can't live without lately, especially during weekends if ever I can be convinced to go out of the house.

I recently got these cheap shades from Forever 21. They were on 30% off, too! I don't get buying shades that costs more than P500. As long as shades shield my eyes from the sun and look good with my face shape, I don't know why I should spend more when I can spend less. But maybe I'm just ignorant? I don't know! Anyway I like this pair because of the vintage-y shape.

I've had these Ferretti espadrilles since, oh, July. I've been meaning to write a full blog post about them, but I never can seem to get a nice outfit photo with it! I do wear this pair all the time though.

I'm in our house in Cavite for the Holy Week. You can imagine how extremely boring it is, so I've taken it upon myself to explore some papers stashed away in cabinets and boxes. Like my mother, I had a tendency of being a pack rat. I'd keep all my stuff, especially papers, since I can't let go of this idea that they'll be useful someday. I became a different person when I started living in a condo so I don't hoard everything anymore - at least, not as much as I used to.

While rummaging through notebooks, test papers, and school projects from as far back as seven years ago, I found treasure. It's a stapled-together sheaf of paper where my high school classmates wrote down all their dreams and ambitions.

So yesterday Marco and I went to Makati. He attended a meeting, while I, well, I just tagged along and decided to work outside for a change. 

Marco recently bought a car and he's crazy about it. That's the first thing he'd think about in the morning and the last thing he'd think about at night. It's a Toyota Starlet GT, a rally car with a turbo engine. Yes I know that because he won't stop talking about it. It's supposed to be a rare car, which is why he chose it over a new car, but I don't get it. Men and cars. I just don't get it.

If you've been following this blog, you'll know that I've been working as a freelancer for the last three months. So how is it? Pretty cool, actually. I get to work on my own time. I get to attend events, nap, or play Xbox whenever I want to. It's great to stay inside the comforts of my place here in Makati most of the time, so if you ask me, I have zero regrets.

That is not to say that it wasn't difficult at the start. One of the most terrifying things I've done in my life so far is quitting my full-time job. Heck, I'm only 22. I was terrified that I haven't paid my dues enough and wouldn't make it as a freelancer. I was terrified of being poor. I was terrified of having to come back home to the province and live with my Mom (she's awesome, by the way, but living with my parents isn't my idea of a successful life).

The first month sucked. I earned very little money. However, on the second month, everything turned around. I got big PR gigs out of the blue, an editorial job, then the business boomed. It seemed like doors were opening everywhere - pardon the cliche, but that's the truth. I have never been this busy in my life.